“On the Edge of the Unknown” or “Just Start.”
I’m terrified. Totally terrified. I have waited for years; literally years to be able to sit down and work on this book proposal and here I am balking. I would rather be doing anything else. But I have already washed the dishes and all of the laundry in finished. And I bought groceries this morning.
So I sit here.
More than being afraid of being rejected, I am afraid of doing all of the work of a book proposal and never hearing anything back from any of the publishers. To me, I have always preferred rejection to silence. At least then I know on which side of the fence I am standing.
So I sit here.
I think to myself “SO much scanning, SO much sorting, SO many photos to edit through.” I want to know the outcome of the risk so I can make sure it is worth my sweat. As if that is how the game works. As if everyone else was told the future and guaranteed the results when they took their successful risks.
So I sit here.
I just created a folder on my computer entitled “Book Proposal” - that’s a start, right? But I am still secretly hoping to get a phone call from my friend in Philadelphia or an urgent email that must be dealt with immediately. Maybe I could go for a bike ride? A little fresh air to get the blood flowing? No. I know these are just more distractions and decoys and I must simply put my blinders on and just start.
So I begin.
